My Favorite Student

I think one of the most disturbing event of my life happened last week. Last week I found out that one of my absolute favorite students is pregnant! Now, I have a couple of pregnant students in my classes, but I never could have imagined that I would place Dara in this group. Dara is one of my favorite students. She is just so intelligent that I want to pick apart her brain sometimes. I love to see how she thinks about certain problems. Once Dara and I made it over our initial hump, she has been excelling since. She achieves high grades in class, does her homework, and participates in class. She is a natural leader and is not afraid to tell people what she thinks. With all of those things going for her she still managed to get bit by the pregnancy bug.

Please do not misunderstand me, I don't think that teenage pregnancy is the end all of total existence. I just want so many great things for Dara, and I do not want anything to hold her back. I didn't even notice the small bump protruding from her stomach until a student made a comment to her and pointed it out. From that moment on, I caught myself staring at her just to see if it was true. In teaching you learn that students say things to other students all the time, and for the most part, they are just joking around with each other. I thought that I saw something, but I dismissed it as the way her shirt fit her. I could have come right out and asked her, but I didn't for two reasons: First, I want to offend her, and second, I did not want to believe it if it was true. The truth has a way of coming out. I found out what I already knew about Dara in the lunchroom. Dara was wearing her usually cute outfit to school. The shirt fit very snugly around her stomach and a bump was sticking out. I saw the cafeteria lady look and her stomach, then ask Dara, "What do you have in there?" Dara smiled a replied, "A fetus." I was happy and sad within the same moment. I was happy that she was learning something in Biology-fetus, and I was sad that she was actually carrying one.

Later when I saw Dara that day I asked her about it, and she confirmed that she was pregnant. It bothered me for days. When I think about her situation, two things come into my mind. First, Dara is a bright child, so I know that she has the potential to do great things for herself. I also know that she is a caring person so she will take care of her child. At the same time I just hope that she does not let her situation hold her back from doing the great things she is destined to do.

Relationships

Relationships. From MTC's preaching to faculty meetings, everyone's talking about building relationships with your students. I listened, and I tried, but I just could not seem to build a relationship with every student. Throughout this school year there was one student who I felt completely hated me. She tuned me out, always put up a screen with me. If she did decided to listen one day, she had a smart comment to add after every word I said. She was a constant discipline problem; during my two weeks at the school, Lottie called me a bitch in front on the entire classroom; and she refused to listen to any directions I gave her. Also, she refused to do her work. This lovely person's name is Lottie.

I am not sure how Lottie and I started off on the wrong foot. Perhaps she was mad that she has just gotten a new teacher who actually required her to do work in class. Perhaps she was used to just doing and saying what she wanted to when her old teacher was there. Perhaps I will never know the real reason, however, I do know that Lottie and I began on a bad note.

I do not know how I started to build a relationship with Lottie, maybe it was during one of those many, many conferences we had together. I remember explaining to Lottie and her mother how much I care about Lottie and her progress in my classroom. I explained to Lottie that if I did not care about her, then I would not be on her to do better. Nothing happened immediately. Lottie was still up to being the same bad attitude Lottie. Changes started happening gradually. When it was her turn to read, she actually did instead of just sitting there or yelling, "I don't want to read that!" She started participating in class more, and I made it an extra effort to praise her more in class. I asked her softball games were going, and she would tell me about it. I also made some positive calls home to express how happy I was with Lottie's attitude change.

Lottie is not a perfect student, but she is improving. I'm at the point with her that I can give her a pat on the back, and she will smile and know that she is doing a good job in class. Once Lottie started doing her work, I learned that she is actually a very intelligent child. She actually completes assignments now and is not a behavior problem like she used to be. At times I allow Lottie to be a leader in the classroom and direct her responsibilities. She enjoys the attention and the praise.

I am really glad that I took the extra time and effort to pursue a relationship with Lottie. As a result of that effort, I have less behavior problem out of her and she is actually performing to her potential in class. Relationships are very, very important in the classroom, and I can say that Lottie helped me to really understand that fact.